I know it's been a while, and I am very sorry. I honestly couldn't tell you what exactly has kept me from writing, other than lack of inspiration, or simply not wanting to. Sleep seems to come before just about anything in my life. But then again i'm sure no one has really noticed my absence. My voice isn't a powerful one and my words usually mean nothing to anyone but me. But it's okay. I enjoy writing. That's all that should matter right?
Well, it's September now, which is probably one of the best times of the year to me, because every year until forever, I will be celebrating another year with the love of my life on the 15th. It's so hard to believe that 365 days have gone by and we're still going strong. Possibly stronger than ever. This year we have surprised ourselves and others, that's for sure, so, I decided to record a snippet, of my first year, and what it has taught me. After all, you only have a "first year" once, right?
15. It wasn't as hard as they said it would be. And by they, I mean everyone. Everyone said it would be a fight all the time, trying to get used to a new lifestyle, making choices together, being together all the time. For Dyllon and I, that wasn't really the case. There were spats, a couple of serious arguments, but within the hour, we were past it. Sometimes, neither of us is right. We settle on that. Don't hold grudges. Maybe that's just us.
14. He can't always read my mind.
As much as I desperately want him to, he doesn't always know what i'm thinking. One thing I've always loved about Dyllon, is that he picks up my vibes, and can almost always tell when something is irritating me, even when I'm unsure yet. But more often than not, even though he knew I was upset, I found myself expecting him to know why without telling him. No. No. No. Learning to TELL HIM, was a big character change for me, but a progressive one. It makes things easier, that's for sure. This goes hand in hand with willingness to understand. What I mean by that is, I have learned to not jump to conclusion on things, and listen to what he has to say. It all comes back to communicating, because without that, you might was well give up now.
13. We're messy folks.
Haha, this is an understatement. We are lazy when it comes to keeping the house clean. It's bad, but we work so much, sometimes it's hard to keep up. Almost ALL of my friends haven't even seen the house yet because it's in constant disarray. I am hoping that this is something we can overcome in year two. We'll see how that goes.
12. ALL of me loves ALL of you.
What I mean by this, is, if you are only giving half of your effort all of the time, then everything is like a slow moving train. Marriage doesn't equal 100%, combined between us. Marriage equals 200% between us. If both sides do not give their all all the time, 100%, then what's the point in trying at all?
Giving your best means receiving your best, and who doesn't love that.
11. We'll never stop dating.
And thank goodness for that. I learned that date nights are precious, and that I don't need to take them for granted. Spending one on one time with my handsome man, is some sacred time, and I need to cherish it more.
10. Divorce is a dirty word.
This is something we never say to eachother nor do I think we ever will. Before we ever said "I do" Dyllon and I decided that divorce was never an option for us. We made a pact that if we came to some sort of crappy place in our marriage to always do EVERYTHING in our power to work through it and even if we felt we could not, we would refuse to sign any papers, and continue to work on things until they were fixed. That's just us. We're in this for life.
9. I don't know him inside and out.
And I probably never will. I learn him a little more daily, and will continue to do so until the day that we die. I find this intriguing. That I can spend every day with someone and still learn something new every day. It's like re-reading a book, and reading something new every time.
8. We eat a lot.
7. If I love me, then I can love him.
And by that I mean love him to my full potential. When I am caught up picking myself apart, flaw by flaw, sometimes, I get in to deep. Then I realize, that I am shaming the woman that my husband wants to look at for the rest of his life. He thinks I am beautiful, every inch of me. So insulting myself is like insulting him. I haven't stopped completely yet, but it's getting better.
6. He is my partner in crime. From photoshoots, to gym time, Dyllon has proved to me this year (not that I have asked him to or anything) that he is going to join me in things that I love, and help me to keep pushing toward my goals. I am the same for him. Wanting each other to succeed is something that I feel has helped us really strive to go after what we want in life. His victories feel like my victories, and vice versa. I lost 20 pounds, we celebrate. He gets promoted, we celebrate. It's a good thing, don't worry.
5. He sees it all.
At my worst and my best, he's seen it all. He's heard me snoring, seen me drooling on my pillow, sunburned, sick, make-up-less, in need of a shower, you name it. But it goes both ways, farts, burps, sweaty, dirty, gross moments, from either of us, we've seen in each other. There's no turning back. We've seen too much! D: There isn't some magical spell cast the moment we said I do. We have gross moments before marriage, they're still there after marriage. Live with it.
4. It's "ours" now. Not "mine".
At least with most things. Aside from the obvious, clothes, shampoo, razors, blah. What's his is mine, and what's mine is his. Acceptance of that has proven challenging but rewarding, for sure.
3. It IS possible to accomplish things in your first year of marriage.
I say this because I was the one, who thought that we'd get nowhere in the first year. I figured we'd be in the same apartment with the same jobs, doing the same things as we were the day before we got married. but GOD, let me tell ya, sure has showed in our lives this year.
-We bought a house.
-We got a puppy.
-Dyllon got promoted.
-I graduated college.
-We bought a car!!!!!!! $*#&*%#!
Also, we lasted. And when I say that, it's basically a big IN YOUR FACE to those who made bets that we wouldn't make it through our first year. Going strong haters! Back up.
First, we never let our hearts echo their doubts. Second, we NEVER let our lips deliver the poison into the center of our marriage. Cast the external opinions aside, make it clear where your allegiance lies, and stand RESOLUTELY behind each other.
2. Praying together, does amazing things.
In me personally, when he takes my hand at dinner, and thanks God for his life with me, and our life together, and for our meal, I couldn't be more proud of him. I also couldn't possibly feel more close to him. Prayer is a whole new level of intimacy, that I didn't know could exist. But it does.
1. A Christ centered marriage is the best choice we ever made.
God loves us. He brought us together so that we could be happily joined and have a wonderful life. Why would we not only consult Him in our every choice in life, but praise Him in everything thing that we do. We have surely been over come obstacles in this past year, but God has truly helped us get through them all. We seek him in our weakness, and praise Him in our success. We try to keep Him in everything we do and I think that has helped us lightyears. God reigns in our marriage when we make sure neither of us reigns in His place.
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